However, not everybody finds him or herself in that envious situation at an early stage in one’s life. We do not choose to whom we are born, and under what circumstances we spend our childhood. Sometimes things happen in people’s lives, unplanned and unintended, that throws them off balance ever so slightly or even badly. Single motherhood is most likely challenging for both the mom and child. Loss of employment creates financial hardships for most. A broken romance during high school does leave marks on one’s heart.
What does the word “jaded” mean? The Urban Dictionary is sometimes our place to go for definitions. The dictionary’s top definition for jaded is “The end result of having a steady flow of negative experiences, disappointment, and unfulfillment fed into a person where they get to the point where their anger circuits just sort of burn out and they accept disillusionment.”
Are you feeling jaded, somehow? Do you fear for being perceived as jaded, somehow? How disillusioned are you?
Nope, feeling jaded is not a good state of mind when seeking to find a significant other. Disillusionment by itself, however, is not a bad thing. Just think about all the silly people who can’t ever wean themselves off of movies like the Fantastic Four, Batman, or other Hollywood-style fantasies.
But you do not want to be disillusioned about life itself when trying to present yourself as a viable partner for relationships that might create new life.
Feeling jaded from negative experiences, disappointment, and unfulfillment isn’t really a good feeling. However, if you know that you do feel jaded, you are at least aware that something weird is possibly going on within you. Awareness is a good thing, and it gives you an advantage over others who do not reflect on their state of mind and keep on going without seeking a possible change.
It might not take much to get over feeling jaded, somehow. Awareness alone can help keep that feeling in check, it might dissipate one day all by itself if you can be honest with yourself about yourself. Then there are people one can talk to about that jaded feeling. Find a mentor, a friend, a pastor, a grownup, someone whom you can trust a little. Make the effort to start a conversation or two about yourself and your circumstances with a mature person before getting into a new relationship. It’s like polishing yourself up a bit before going to the grand gala.
Almost any man looks good in a new suit. A little makeup and a new hairstyle go a long way, too. But these things do not get you over feeling jaded or being perceived as jaded, somehow.
For that, you will need to find or restore hope – which they say springs eternal. Some people in history have shown a remarkable ability to persevere in the face of overwhelming obstacles. Martin Luther King comes to mind, obviously. Yes, sometimes it seems to be easier to stand up for others than for one’s self. But in the case of courtship, you will have to stand up for yourself and for what you believe in – and regardless of negative experiences, disappointments, and unfulfillment.
So, make a new start. Do believe that life is worth living and live a worthy life.